4
.. I’m due for a break, anyway.”She shut the door and I followed her through the house to the kitchen, where she meandered around starting the coffee maker, finding biscuits, that sort of thing. But she wasn’t moving systematically, rather, I thought, avoiding facing me. The coffee – which smelt wonderful – finished dripping through, and she poured a mug of it, black, for me and another, with cold milk, for herself. She sat with hers almost opposite and waved at the plate of biscuits.“Help yourself, Rick.”I took a chocolate digestive and bit into it, watching Gillian, who sat with her head down, clutching her drink. I chewed and swallowed. “Gillian, why have you been avoiding me?”“I haven’t...”“Gillian,” I interrupted as quietly and gently as I could, “remember what I do? If I’ve done something wrong, if I’ve offended you in some way, please, tell me.”“I can’t ... I don’t want ... to say.”I sighed, and sipped at my coffee as I tried to work out where to go next. “Lovely coffee, as. You know, talking about the kids pisses me off, after all it was the monstrous lie you told about being pregnant that trapped me into this marriage to start with.”She flinched like I’d slapped her. The tears came in earnest then. “Please don’t say that! It wasn’t like that at all, it wa...”“It was about the most horrible thing to do to a man that can be done. Oh, I fully intended to marry you, you knew that. But I wanted to get established in my career first. That didn’t mesh with your plans though, did it? You needed to hook me right away, to save me from myself. You, Mike, my so called father, you all knew my sense of honor. You all knew I’d do the right thing. I was actually happy, can you believe that? I couldn’t wait to see our daughter. It had to be a daughter, didn’t it? You knew my fondness for your sister’s little girl, another carefully constructed exploitation on your part. I always wondered why you weren’t showing at least a little. I lay awake nights, wondering if she.
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